Recent revelations and rabbit holes have revealed that I may be autistic. This probability has driven me to self-reflect and ask many questions about my life. One question that's been eating at my brain is the fact that I excelled at military service and how could an autistic person do so well in such a rigid profession? The only answer I keep coming back to is the Army must be autistic.
Now there is a fine line to walk here. Not all autism is the same and is therefore categorized into different levels. I would classify the Army and myself as being Level 1, which is "Requiring Support". Individuals that fall into this tier are described as potentially needing some support but are otherwise independent. Perfect, I've always required some support in my life, and the Army requires all kinds of support...like money to operate. I think this is where we'll draw our line and begin our discovery of the autistic Army. Let's take a look at some of the personality traits that actually make the Army autistic.
A Strict Reliance on Routine
This is soooo obvious! The Army thrives on routine. When I was still in, I had several "administrative roles". A good portion of my career was in operations, and this is where I learned that the Army likes to take routine to the extreme. The Army likes EVERYTHING planned and therefore goes to great lengths to ensure this, often creating training schedules that span out years in advance.
Typically when we got into short-term planning (days to weeks) from the execution of a training plan, it was just securing assets and fine-tuning details frequently down to the minute. This entire process was done to satiate the Army's autistic need to have a routine in an otherwise chaotic profession. Just think about it: what is more autistic than perseverating on what you're going to do years in advance and then becoming dysregulated (yelling and screaming) when that plan isn't executed fully? Autism.
Intense Hyper-Focused Interests
The Army loves hyper-focusing on things that it deems "important". This will often lead Soldiers down many different rabbit holes in the quest of "gathering information" or becoming a "subject-matter expert" on any given military topic. This type of extreme focus, many would argue, is nothing more than a strong work ethic and the willful desire to do your best. That's a fair assumption, but I will provide a brief personal anecdote just to illustrate this claim.
About 5 years into my career, I applied for and was accepted to join a highly specialized, small team. I won't go into specifics, but this team was extremely technical and had the possibility of actual real-world danger.
Shortly after my initial schooling was complete, my team leader took me and another new guy into our conference room and started drilling us on the nitty-gritty specifics of different pieces of equipment that we were supposed to know about and employ.
I say "supposed to know" because through this exercise he revealed that "we didn't know shit" and that was unacceptable. To give you context on what we were being quizzed on, it would be the equivalent of memorizing an instruction manual spanning hundreds of pages. Some of the questions were so insanely obscure that at one point, I thought the entire boondoggle was a joke. It was not. So, I became hyper-focused on learning all the aforementioned information, and I did learn it because...autism.
Emotional Dysregulation and Meltdowns
This is another one that should be apparent, but I'll expand anyway because I want to. There is an ongoing public perception of how the military and subsequently the Army present themselves. If you were asked to envision the Army in general, I would hazard to guess that a glaring drill sergeant pops into your head. Who is more dysregulated than a drill sergeant? No one, that's who.
These cats are constantly yelling, even when they don't have to, not to mention that they fly off the handle about the craziest things. Leave a corner on your bunk slightly untucked—essentially breaking their sacred visual routine—and boom: "OMG what is this!!!!! AHhhhhhhhHHH, FIX IT NOW PRIVATE!" That right there is a textbook autistic meltdown.
When I was in basic training, I literally saw a drill sergeant lose his mind in front of our eyes. I don't even remember what the offense was, but I'll never forget his words in response, "OH NO, Craaaazzyyyy!" It was as if he were transforming into a werewolf right before our eyes, his face and eyes contorted while verbalizing his exact thoughts, which should've probably been kept inside, buried deep down like all the subsequent trauma inflicted on us unsuspecting privates in the aftermath.
Needless to say, Soldiers have extreme emotional dysregulation, which is most likely issued to them by the Army at CIF. The list of these meltdowns is infinite in my experience. I've seen all kinds of people who were calm one second and then completely lost it the next because a plan shifted or an item was out of place. These individuals were usually in the higher ranks, and I can only guess this phenomenon is enhanced by longer times spent in the Army because the Army inherently makes you autistic.
Social or Communication Challenges
This definitely overlaps with dysregulation but caters to the Army's inability to function in civil or polite society. If you've ever spent any time around Soldiers you'll begin to notice a few distinct patterns in communication.
Soldiers are typically very blunt, which is also a trait of autistic behavior. I'm guilty of most of the items on this list, but this one especially applies to me. I and many other Soldiers like me have no problem giving you their unadulterated opinion on you or any topic that you may want an opinion on. This is also very apparent if we don't like something because we usually have no issue telling you what we don't like and why it should stop.
Despite our communication challenges, the Army often likes to engage in a social activity appropriately titled "mandatory fun". These "fun" social events are mandated by leadership, and Soldiers are often encouraged to invite families to these mandatory outings. They are typically not fun, and everyone knows it. I think they continue these exercises in futility because that's what the normies expect us to do. But, if you've ever been to one of these events, expect lots of milling about in awkward silence.
Again, I could go on about the yelling and screaming and how that ties into the inability to appropriately express oneself, but I've already covered that.
So there ya have it, just a small glimpse and very scientific review of why the Army has autism. I may even be able to make the claim that the Army gave me autism, which would add one more thing to my ever-growing list of challenges. One thing is for certain: there is a place for everyone, and if you need just a little support because of your level-1 autism, the Army is the place for you! You are welcome to drop me a line and let me know your thoughts. I would love to bluntly give you my opinion on them.
Dad out.