I like to take some pride in my cooking, but my kids sure don't. It's one of the few things that I do relatively well, but as the title plainly states, my kids hate my cooking. Now "hate" might be a bit of an overstatement, but I would estimate that they eat what I cook less than fifty percent of the time.
I get it. I know exactly what you're thinking, "bUt ThAt'S jUsT hOw KiDs ArE!" No. That's how we think they are. Everyone, even kids, is capable of appreciating a good meal. We don't have to feed them constant, processed slop to make them happy. At least that's the hill I'm dying on. I work damn hard to provide quality meals for my family, because I love them. But it get's super old day after day of your kids not eating what you make and then complaining incessantly to give them literal trash that a raccoon wouldn't even touch. I've seen things, I know.
This is also a point of mild debate between my wife and me. Now, I concede that she's somewhat of an "expert" (please envision me doing air quotes for effect) on the topic, being that she's a pediatric occupational therapist.
She consistently claims that our kids aren't picky. Every time it comes up, her face converts into a blank, 100-yard stare, and she states, "You haven't seen picky." in her most ominous voice. I will also caveat this point by stating that she participated in a research study while attending grad school on picky eating in children. Pffft, big deal! I know what my eyes perceive and my feelings feel.
So, what do I do to alleviate this burden on my children and myself? I try to make foods that I think they would enjoy but still aren't made of garbage. This leads me to the crux of my current situation. Eating healthy is expensive. It just is. I don't know why, but I'm guessing that quality products take more time to produce, etc...Whatever, it's horseshit. If it's what all producers committed to, it wouldn't be a big deal, but people and businesses typically like to take the path of least resistance and that means crap food at a discount. So, you can imagine how frustrating it might be when you spend the time and money to plan and execute awesome meals just to have your kids not eat them! It's infuriating.
To add fuel to the fire, my youngest is predominantly nonverbal. While eating meals, she'll often audibly say, "no, no, no" to eating the meal provided. Then to rub salt in the wound, on her "talker" (it's an iPad with pre-programmed words or phrases that will say out loud the picture she touches), she'll then politely say what she does want, which is usually "cookies", "crackers", or "ice cream". Which is fine, we all have our own preferences, right?
Wrong, she'll hammer that picture over and over again until you actually start to believe what she's saying sounds like a good idea. I'm not talking about tapping that thing a few times, oh no. She is incessant and makes sure you know what she wants, even after we say no, by hammering you with that monotone, robotic voice. "Cookie, cookie, cookie, cookie. Cheez-Its, cookie, cracker." I think you get the point.
The point is, I keep trying and I will continue to try regardless of the outcome because I love my family. They deserve my best and I'm going to give it one uneaten meal at a time. Dad out.
(These are a few of the meals both kids did eat...mostly. )
